The Value of A Committed Father

Shane M. Jones, LSCSW

With Father’s Day having just passed, I thought it would be good to address the matter of the value of a committed father.  Most everyone in mental health and related fields, agrees that while the mother is the more important figure when children are young, it is the father who becomes a more important factor in children’s development as they start moving into and through puberty.  Now don’t get me wrong, both parents are very important all through a child’s life, however, there are periods when one parent holds a more effective place in their lives than the other. 

I want to clarify one thing for sure in this article, and that is the assumption by many fathers that “going to work to provide for your family” is a major contribution showing how dedicated of a father (and husband)you are.  My point is, that while it is right to provide a good living for your family, going to work it is something that any man worth his salt would do whether he had a family or not.  So, lets talk about what really matters in being a good father. 

Let me share an example of a good father, and the results of his efforts:  Jonathan Edwards, best known for his sermon, “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God”, was a Pastor, writer, and President of Princeton University.  Mr. Edwards had 11 children, and was committed to spending one full hour every day with his children after he got home from work.  He would talk with them, and listen to what they had to say, and of his known male descendants there were:

*Over 300 Pastors *120 professors @ Universities* 110 Attorneys *60 Prominent authors *14 Presidents of Universities & Colleges *30 Judges *3 served in the U. S. Congress *1 Vice-president of the United States

I could now go into all the ways in which fathers can be effective, and their would be a good sized list, however, let’s just focus on some of the key lessons we can get from Jonathan Edwards. One, he made his children a priority of his focused attention, two, he showed them tremendous value by making time for them, and three, he imparted himself to them.  You don’t have to be “SUPER DAD” to be a good father, but if you make these principles more a part of your life with your children you will look like SUPER DAD.  How can we expect our children to understand a loving heavenly Father, we don’t show them the best example of an earthly father?  Now if you will excuse me I need to go out to look at some tadpole's with my daughter that I have been “just too busy to do” for the last couple of days. (I hate it when I step on my own toes!)  Up, Up, and away.